This City Is Too Small For My Dreams. ♥

♡ ☮ [Alishah. 18. NY.] ♡ ☮

swagamanjaro:

strangelyobsessedwithstuff:

vialsofbrightforgettingpowders:

ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR NOTEPAD
THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE FUCKERS

YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A NEWBORN
SO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH.

NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED. PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITH A BUBBLE BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE.
NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS WORKING

NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE

GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS CLASS DISMISSED

IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS POST FOR AGESthanks for the tip karkat

wat

Posted on 23 July, 2014
Reblogged from bolbi-fucking-stroganovsky  Source sliceofbri

Posted on 23 July, 2014
Reblogged from liquid-lightt  Source filmchrist

Posted on 23 July, 2014
Reblogged from stopclaire2k14  Source chadleymacguff

lovequotesrus:

Everything you love is here

Posted on 23 July, 2014
Reblogged from lovequotesrus  

lauren-jauregui:

pashmere:

omfg this gif is the answer for everything

"how are you?"

image

"did you get a good grade?"

image

"how’s your romantic life?"

image

how’s ronaldo doing in the world cup so far?

image

Posted on 23 July, 2014
Reblogged from spork  Source pashmere

blushy-fallen-angel:

strokemyglabella:

perkeleen-tursas:



perfect usage of that gif

Reblogging just because of the gif.

Posted on 23 July, 2014
Reblogged from i-would-run-to-her  Source eyeballfarts

castiel-is-wonderful:

sionainnlindsay:

castiel-is-wonderful:

WAIT HOLD THE FUCK UP

IS ‘MRS’ JUST MR’S 

LIKE BELONGING TO MR

OMG

Mr comes from the French monsieur, which I think literally translates as ‘my lord’ and basically just means master, and Mrs comes from maistre which is the feminine form of master, so actually—for once—no.

This was an extremely relevant comment and I thank you for educating me 

Posted on 23 July, 2014
Reblogged from skwisgaarvevo  Source khaleeesii

Posted on 22 July, 2014
Reblogged from v0rpal  Source tyleroposey

eccedentesiast-me:

spermjackiavelli:

miss-nerdgasmz:

modifiedmermaid:

freemindfreebody:

swift-as-the-coursing-river:

jimcavill:

Because a man has to be a sociopath to love a woman with cellulite. Fuck this world. 

If all residents of hell look like Scarlett Johansson, I renounce my atheism and take up Satanism

whoever wrote this needs to be punched. a lot.

oh no 27. im 19 and have it, welcome to the non airbrushed real world

#that article is bullshit #i would pay anything to look as good as her #like goddamn

I’m 20 and I have stretch marks and cellulite.

I’m 16 and have cellulite and stretch marks…. and I think I’m gorgeous!

Posted on 22 July, 2014
Reblogged from bodies-in-the-sky  

Posted on 22 July, 2014
Reblogged from confusing-mixed-up-life  Source drawing-interrupted


Vivid Theme by JoachimT
Powered by Tumblr

Install Theme